Sign in or 
Share this
Thank our Fallen Stars - Cirrus
Ever since I was a child I have puzzled over something my mother always told me, to thank the fallen stars, I could never understand. It didn't make sense to me, why thank something that is gone from this world, completely and totally, something that will never effect your life again. I asked her time and time again what she meant, she always just said I would never understand if she told me, I had to find out on my own.
I thank her for not telling me now, it wouldn't hold the same power that it does if she had tried to explain. Season have past since then though, and I have grown from a smalll kit that knew nothing of the world, into the young adult I am now. Somehow I don't think she wanted me to understand it this soon, I think she hoped I would be old, and have had children and seen them grow before I fully understood. It didn't work like that though, I'm sure that, if she still watched me from the other side, she wouldn't be happy to find I had to learn this so quickly...so soon.
Yet I lay here, and understand it, its the only thing that keeps me from giveing up. My body is weak from the fight, breath shallow, and i cannot even strech out a hand to close the dead eyes that stare at me, long since fogged over, lifeless. it hurts to look at him, but i can't take my eyes from the kind face that just moments before was the last thing I wanted to see. Why had he come? Ren, my mate. I had told him not to, not to come, but he had, he knew I couldn't win alone knew the only path that I walked down. So he took it for me, gave me a way out, gave me his own path. The tears sting my face now, hot as they slide over my blood-stained skin. My mate may have been my whole life, but he knew that I was his, and knew that i had little ones comeing, we were going to have a family. Such a bitter taint on my mind, thinking about that now, while he lies there dead, the only foundation that once kept a now broken dream alive.
I finally manage to move my arm, pulling him close to me and burrying my head in his quills, the last time I shall ever do so I know. What are we know but too Sandslash who will never live again. He in actuallity, myself in thought, and perhaps ill die here too, god knows I want too. Though, then what was the point in him giveing me the chance to live, merely for the ability to choose that i had never had until now, or to actually change my fate? I'll never know, here in the distance now, i can hear them comeing, if i don't die before they get here, then I will live. I want to for the kits..perhaps just until they are born..."Then ill join you again my love." I whisper softly into his ear letting him fall from my hold to land face down beside me, my back still pressed against the tree, still prpping me up so that I can atch them come to me, the flock of skamory, that arivved to late to help the fourth division in the fight, but perhaps others have survived like me...perhaps. I close my eyes as I hear them getting closer and then, finallyI hear them landing, spreading out through the bodies that lay strewn acrossed the feild laid to waste, some parts still burning giant fissuers in others. Im probably leaning against the only reamining tree. From far away i hear a cry from one of the skamorys. "This ones alive." I am relived, I am not the only one...not the only one. Not long after someones wing brushes against my face. I mumble to the bird. "Fallen stars, have gone to far..." This makes no snese of course, unless his mother told him about fallen stars too, i doubt it. opening my eyes again though every part of me screams for the darkness to overtake me, to let it all go numb, so i won't have to think.
Its fitting the captain should find me, we are both alike, only I led my troops into a fight i knew we couldn't win, he brought his to save his friends. I say nothing, but he nods to me, i can tll hes already seen my dead mate beside me, he knows about my relationship with Ren was more than comradely, he knows what I feel. I sigh softly. "ive killed them all." I manage to force from my mouth, my black eyes looking at him. "I wanted to go with them but...I am the one who lives...ill carry a burden now...forever." I say, eyes pleading for him to not argue against it, I know its true, I failed them all, i just couldn't wait...He says nothing, and I close my eyes again, this time letting myself fall away, the last thing i know is his call, and several sounds of swishing wings as I am lifted away from the place where my mate left me, away...away..and i thank god, for my fallen star.
I thank her for not telling me now, it wouldn't hold the same power that it does if she had tried to explain. Season have past since then though, and I have grown from a smalll kit that knew nothing of the world, into the young adult I am now. Somehow I don't think she wanted me to understand it this soon, I think she hoped I would be old, and have had children and seen them grow before I fully understood. It didn't work like that though, I'm sure that, if she still watched me from the other side, she wouldn't be happy to find I had to learn this so quickly...so soon.
Yet I lay here, and understand it, its the only thing that keeps me from giveing up. My body is weak from the fight, breath shallow, and i cannot even strech out a hand to close the dead eyes that stare at me, long since fogged over, lifeless. it hurts to look at him, but i can't take my eyes from the kind face that just moments before was the last thing I wanted to see. Why had he come? Ren, my mate. I had told him not to, not to come, but he had, he knew I couldn't win alone knew the only path that I walked down. So he took it for me, gave me a way out, gave me his own path. The tears sting my face now, hot as they slide over my blood-stained skin. My mate may have been my whole life, but he knew that I was his, and knew that i had little ones comeing, we were going to have a family. Such a bitter taint on my mind, thinking about that now, while he lies there dead, the only foundation that once kept a now broken dream alive.
I finally manage to move my arm, pulling him close to me and burrying my head in his quills, the last time I shall ever do so I know. What are we know but too Sandslash who will never live again. He in actuallity, myself in thought, and perhaps ill die here too, god knows I want too. Though, then what was the point in him giveing me the chance to live, merely for the ability to choose that i had never had until now, or to actually change my fate? I'll never know, here in the distance now, i can hear them comeing, if i don't die before they get here, then I will live. I want to for the kits..perhaps just until they are born..."Then ill join you again my love." I whisper softly into his ear letting him fall from my hold to land face down beside me, my back still pressed against the tree, still prpping me up so that I can atch them come to me, the flock of skamory, that arivved to late to help the fourth division in the fight, but perhaps others have survived like me...perhaps. I close my eyes as I hear them getting closer and then, finallyI hear them landing, spreading out through the bodies that lay strewn acrossed the feild laid to waste, some parts still burning giant fissuers in others. Im probably leaning against the only reamining tree. From far away i hear a cry from one of the skamorys. "This ones alive." I am relived, I am not the only one...not the only one. Not long after someones wing brushes against my face. I mumble to the bird. "Fallen stars, have gone to far..." This makes no snese of course, unless his mother told him about fallen stars too, i doubt it. opening my eyes again though every part of me screams for the darkness to overtake me, to let it all go numb, so i won't have to think.
Its fitting the captain should find me, we are both alike, only I led my troops into a fight i knew we couldn't win, he brought his to save his friends. I say nothing, but he nods to me, i can tll hes already seen my dead mate beside me, he knows about my relationship with Ren was more than comradely, he knows what I feel. I sigh softly. "ive killed them all." I manage to force from my mouth, my black eyes looking at him. "I wanted to go with them but...I am the one who lives...ill carry a burden now...forever." I say, eyes pleading for him to not argue against it, I know its true, I failed them all, i just couldn't wait...He says nothing, and I close my eyes again, this time letting myself fall away, the last thing i know is his call, and several sounds of swishing wings as I am lifted away from the place where my mate left me, away...away..and i thank god, for my fallen star.
Cyren |
Latest page update: made by Cyren
, Sep 23 2007, 12:31 AM EDT
(about this update
About This Update
put in italics.
- Cyren
2 words added 1 word deleted view changes - complete history) |
|
Keyword tags:
fanfic
More Info: links to this page
|
There are no threads for this page.
Be the first to start a new thread.
